misuse of the "cancer card"

I spent the evening at a very lovely wedding of a good friend. Weddings are tricky for me because I hate going to "couple" events solo. But, I almost always end up in that predicament. (shrug) What's a single girl to do?

I couldn't pass up the opportunity to witness the union of my friend and watch her joy and happiness. And since I am on a mission to continue to push myself out of my comfort zone -- and spend time among the living -- it was a good way to spend the day.

I've been to many weddings in my day. For awhile, I was on a wedding-fast. But I've since gotten over that (gotten over myself really) and feel privileged and honored when asked to share in a couple's magical moment of wedded bliss. Generally speaking, I love and enjoy just about everything about a wedding... except the bouquet toss.

I've been "single" all my life. And no matter how many times I have been called to participate in the bouquet toss, it never gets any easier to stroll to the front of the assembly and let it be known that yes, I am single and yes, I do hope to get married... someday to someone. So much so... that I will (in my good clothes and high heels) momentarily "fight" another sister (actually a group of sisters) for the opportunity to grab some good fortune in love and be the one who wins the bouquet toss.

Lots of good intentions... I'm sure that the bride wants her single friends to experience the love and devotion she's feeling on that day. But, for the forever single (like me) it just feels like more of a bulls-eye on my chest. Honestly speaking... I tend to sit out the bouquet toss. Good intentions aside.

It was my intention to sit out the bouquet toss tonight. I was a little tired. The day had gone long AND I walked around in 4 inch heels all day. I wasn't exhausted, but I had definitely lost a little pep in my step. Imagine the look on my face when I heard my name (FULL NAME-first and last) announced on the microphone to come to the front for the bouquet toss. My "date"... another good girlfriend, was called out too.

We were stunned. Had to laugh at the shock of it. But the classic moment of hilarity was when the maid of honor (another friend) came all the way to the back of the room to get us for the bouquet toss... and I tried to use the "cancer card".

As smooth as you please, when the maid of honor told us we had to come to the front... I tried to play my hand.

"I'm not going up there. I have cancer. I am tired."

I know. I know. I should be ashamed of myself.

It was a blatant MIS-USE of the cancer card. My "date" looked so shocked when I said it. She fell out laughing when the maid of honor replied...

"I don't give a damn about your cancer. You have been summoned to the front, so get to stepping". And then she stood there, mean mugging me, daring me NOT to get up and participate in the fun. Only a real friend would call you out like that. :)

My cancer card was soundly (and quickly) rejected. And it should have been. I was being a punk. And would have missed out on a happy memory had I remained hidden in my seat at the back of the room. After it was over, I was glad that I did it. That quick moment made me feel like a part of the day, instead of just a witness.

I didn't catch the bouquet (not too surprising). BUT... the maid of honor did. It was a set-up, and a good one. I smiled all the way home thinking about it. Karma is something else. :)