Wednesday, June 2, 2010

New day... new worries... new hopes

I’ve been a little somber these past couple of days. Not exactly sad but quiet. I realized a moment ago that I am grieving a little bit. Friday I go into the hospital for one more surgical procedure on my breasts and when I come out, I will be different. Different isn’t necessarily bad it’s just… well, different.

 

I wish I could say that I was excited at the prospect of have two totally new and perky breasts. But I’m not exactly thrilled. I am always a little nervous and afraid about going into the hospital and having to be sedated and cut on. It’s really not my favorite thing. But, I am sure that I will be singing a different song afterwards when I can wear shirts without a bra (laugh) and lay down on my back without worrying that I’m going to suffocate myself.

 

And I am definitely looking forward to buying lots of pretty lingerie for my new girls. Those are the upsides to this procedure. I am happy that the procedure won’t require an overnight visit at the hospital. And I’ve already got my pain pills ready to go (laughs – Percocet, hmmmm). Its just a matter now of getting to the hospital on time and going to sleep. When I wake up, I’ll be (literally) as good as new.

 

So from the summer of 2008 to the summer of 2010… I have put my body through a lot. Lots of medicine, lots of testing, lots of needles, lots of x-rays… and quite a few surgeries on top. But in the end, (and I guess that this is the end)… I’m a new woman, a whole person and cancer-free. And I get to walk away with two perky new boobies and a flat(ter) tummy.

 

Not a bad exchange.

 

 

 

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