ohmygoodness... constipation? yuck

Sigh.

This post has already embarrassed me and I haven't even written it yet. But I promised myself that I would be honest and open about what I'm going through and this is something that I have to talk about. Its something that the women who will come behind may want to know and be prepared for.

Constipation.

I'm going to try not to be graphic with this one because well... eww... we're talking about "down there". (laughs)

I may have mentioned months back that my treatment makes me constipated. Well, my oncologist told me months ago to be sure to take stool softeners to help with the constipation and to be sure to increase my fiber intake as necessary. Well, I have to admit, I gave up on those stool softeners awhile back. Not that they bothered me or anything but honestly, the constant motion of putting pills in my mouth... all day, every doggone day... has gotten so tired that I try to eliminate taking anything that I don't feel that I can't live without.

For example... my back pain is still here and it doesn't seem to be going anywhere anytime soon. Since I can't live on percocet and now that my oncologist has freaked me out about taking tylenol everyday... I rarely take anything for the pain. At least not while I'm at home. If I'm going out, I'll take some aleve or advil and keep it moving. But while I'm at home, I rest with a heating pad on my back. Its corny and it makes me feel like an old woman -- BUT I'm not throwing pills down my throat. (shrug) That's something for me.

So... after the mastectomy, when I was feeling more like myself... I stopped taking the stool softeners. I figured that I didn't need them as much anymore. Don't ask me why I felt that way -- I just did. I mean, I was going okay and I felt okay so... less pills going down my throat. Seemed like a good thing.

MAN! Wrong. A little red on the tissue alerted me that I have hemorrhoids. (yuck)

Ain't nothing like seeing blood in your toilet to shake you up a bit. Luckily google is my friend, so I researched what it most likely meant and acted accordingly. My mother told me that she had hemorrhoids while pregnant and that they aren't that unusual or even painful sometimes. But they do occur and they are easily treated. And google proved her to be right. (laughs)

I have NOT mentioned this to my oncologist yet for a number of reasons. One, I am learning that as much as I love Dr. S, he can be prescription happy. Two, he is an oncologist, a cancer doctor. And that is ALL that he is. Anything outside of the realm of cancer and he's a little ... well, clueless. Not entirely clueless but his answers typically include a little pad and his illegible signature. Three, I do not want to take any more pills than necessary. Seriously. Four, as gross as this is to me, it doesn't seem to be indicative of anything serious at all. After the fiasco about my back (MRI's, x-rays, percocets and finally an offer to recommend me to a back specialist)... I'm good. I am not in pain. And from what I've read and what my mom told me... as long as things are not hanging out (double yuck) I'm okay.

So, you guessed it. I'm back on stool softeners. And I'll be taking some old fashioned sitz baths until I'm on the mend. (laughs) I swear, every day, every week, something else jumps off that makes me feel like I'm leaping into old age. Sitz baths? (sigh) Actually its not that different from what I do to ease my aches after chemo (or a long day). A little epsom salt really is helpful. I usually soak with epsom salts for a couple of days after chemo to sort of help remove some of that "medicine smell" from my body. Epsom salts help to draw out the toxins in your body... and now I know they can also help with healing hemorrhoids. (laughs)

Before any of you get upset or worried about this... its really not horrible. Basically it means that I was slacking on my pimping... and I got a little backed up.

Ha. Bet you never thought you'd learn that about me. Actually, by the time you read this post, I'll probably be over this hurdle. I'm going to delay the publishing of this for a little while -- just so that I don't break out in a deep blush the next time somebody mentions my blog to me.

Lesson for all the kiddies: Eat your fiber and drink lots of water. It really is good for you.

But if you should end up with hemorrhoids or just really constipated... fear not. Its not that serious and you can treat them without a prescription.

Thank God for small favors. :)