Monday, June 20, 2011
Men are affected by your breast cancer too
I was surprised to learn that a lot of my blog followers are men. For some reason, I assumed that guys would not be interested in reading about my fabulous boobies. (smile) I was wrong... and I've realized that I've been very wrong about the depth of pain and anguish that the men in a breast cancer survivor's life feel.
I will say this upfront -- men baffle me. I have tons of male friends, plenty of male cousins, a younger brother, lots of uncles and a daddy... and I don't understand the way a man's mind works when it comes to emotions at all. I just don't understand it. That said, when I was going through treatment, I felt that my boyfriend did not understand what I was going through or how to handle it and I purchased a book that I had hoped would help him (and me too). However, I ended up reading it myself. The book, "Breast Cancer Husband: How to Help Your Wife (and Yourself) during Diagnosis, Treatment and Beyond", was very interesting and very enlightening for me. Written by the husband of a woman with breast cancer, it spoke in a very different way than the other books I had read about dealing with breast cancer. It was definitely written by a man for a man.
I find myself talking to a lot of guys about the women in their lives who are dealing with breast cancer. And I am always honored that they trust me enough to share their concerns and to ask me what they can do to help. My father has had to deal with breast cancer twice. First, one of his younger sisters had it and then just a few years later, I had it. However, my dad isn't the kind of guy to talk about his feelings and stuff (laughs) so you have to try to interpret what he's feeling by his actions. I believe that he was very hurt and I see/hear that same pain when I talk to other men who try to cope with the breast cancer monster. My only advice to any guy who is trying to cope with this is simply... do your best to simply be there.
Its Father's day weekend and I want to say Happy Father's day to all of the dads in the world -- especially the dads of beautiful little girls who had to fight the breast cancer monster.
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