Monday, January 11, 2010

what color bra are you wearing? did you tell all your facebook friends?


For the past few days, I've received quite a few requests to update my facebook status with the color of my bra. This was supposed to have two goals; to confuse the men of facebook (they weren't invited to participate) and to promote breast cancer awareness.

My reaction: well, no offense to anyone who sent it to me but it seemed really childish. Like... fresh out of someone's junior high school (okay, middle school--I'm old, forgive me) conversation. My second reaction was that I didn't feel comfortable telling that much of my business to the facebook world. My third reaction was the most lasting -- I couldn't figure out how this change would promote breast cancer awareness.

But as a sister who is on a mission to reduce the shame surrounding breast cancer, and to (even better) encourage all women to take charge of their "sexy" and take charge of their breast health, I had to really think about how I felt about this movement. And it was indeed a movement. My Fabulous Boobies is all for women staking their claim on their own sexuality. A healthy body is a sexy body. And healthy boobs (even if its only one, or if there aren't any) are truly sexy and absolutely fabulous.

I've been reading quite a few articles and blog posts about the Facebook effort and I wasn't the only breast cancer survivor who felt oddly on the outside of this particular effort to raise awareness. Some survivors were brought right back to a place of hurt and pain because it was yet another reminder that their bodies were different. Some were angered. I'm sure that many were like me, confused about the point of it all. Which is quite sad actually. But I think that for once, this movement wasn't really about us as much as it was about "them". Them being the millions and millions of women who don't take the time to pay attention to their breasts. They... needed awareness. We (unfortunately) are on a different level of understanding about what breast cancer can do to our bodies.

After thinking about it for some time I've decided that I'm not offended and in fact, I'm grateful for the attention and pleased that it isn't just about being pink. I love that "we" have a color that easily identifies our cause, however, I like the focus on the actual breasts even more. After all, they are the point of the entire conversation.

The beauty of a viral movement like "put your bra color as your facebook status" is that its simple to do, it doesn't discriminate about size or shape of breasts and it can be as racy or as sedate as the participant is comfortable with. Its a little bit naughty but not too much. It causes guys to use their imagination and women to refocus on their own sexiness for a moment.

I read about the reactions of some women who were slightly embarrassed when they looked down to confirm what they were actually wearing. Hmm....? Dilemma. Do I really tell the world that I have on this dingy apparatus, or tweak imaginations and say that I'm sporting a racy, lacy black demi-cup bra? Depends on who you are and who your friends are -- and what your privacy settings are set to. (laughs)

As crazy as it seems... dressing sexy on purpose (all the way down to your undergarments) is something that a lot of women don't do. We're not always conscious about the parts of ourselves that may not actually receive a lot of attention. Or, we're so caught up in not feeling that we look good enough, we end up dressing poorly so that more attention isn't brought to those areas we're uncomfortable with. So, a movement that forces us to look down and then wonder... isn't bad. Its pretty good if it does, in fact, cause women to think about the choice they made when they got dressed. Its made better because it is about a cause that is stripping the world of a lot of talented people every year. I'm willing to bet money (well, maybe cupcakes since I'm not much of a gambler) that next week, a whole lot of women will dress more consciously and pull out their more sexy and appealing undergarments. (laughs)

All it takes is a little attention to remind you that you are in control of certain things. Wearing a pretty bra may seem like a little thing in the grand scheme of all you're responsible for in a day... but when you feel good on the inside, it shows on the outside. So you can rock your prettiest lace bra and still go out with a conservative outfit on. Only your partner will know your secret. But lots of other people will begin to wonder what's different about you.

Look, my body is not the same as it was. It never will be again. I know that -- even if I don't like it. But what made me sexy before cancer was the way I thought about myself and the way that those thoughts carried over to the way that I presented myself. So, if I can work on being sexy with my changed boobies and changed body... then any woman can connect with her inner vixen and feel sexy every day too. All it takes is a little conscious effort.

And while you're feeling sexy... squeeze 'em up. Feel on those boobies. They are fabulous don't ya know?

The first link below is to the Washington Post article about this phenomenon. The second link is to a lingerie store that I highly recommend to all women who wear bras. A well-fitted bra will change your life. I promise you. (laughs) Most women do not wear the right size bra and the poor fit affects the way that you look in your clothes.

Breast cancer awareness goes viral on Facebook . . . with bra color updates

Link to Intimacy - bra fit stylists



PS. Remind me one day to tell you the story about my first trip to Intimacy. It was eye-popping and bumped my sexy swagger up significantly. But that's a story for another day...

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